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September 10, 2019

Quiet

A house with three girls... it certainly is never a silence with them. Either they are laughing, having fun, playing or they are fighting, arguing, bugging each other.

With my daily chores: cleaning, laundry, cooking, driving to do more tasks or to bring someone to after-school activities.

If I am lucky, I get to do things I enjoy like gardening, organizing, reading, crafting, writing, shopping (at times).

There really isn't any quiet time but inside me has been quiet. I am not sure how to explain it but physically I am moving around, full of energy but my heart, brain, my emotion... it's been still, quiet, not moving. I feel like I am in the middle of a chaos and bit by bit, slowly, everything is fading. I don't feel like it's a negative or positive feeling inside of me. It's not like I feel depression or anything like that. It just feels it is what it is or maybe I don't have the energy to analyze it too. I don't even feel like talking to anyone, I don't long for anyone. 

But I have this brief moment (while waiting for my baby to nap) to post here and this is giving me an opportunity to somehow express this weird quietness I am going through. Well like I said, it's not depression (I believe). I'm not sad or unhappy about something. Maybe I'm just tired of feeling and thinking? Maybe this is a good thing- to rest your thoughts and emotion? Maybe quiet is good after all.

P.S. Excuse this post. Just writing as I think. I don't care about grammar, spelling, and punctuation right now. Thanks.