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January 13, 2021

Gratefulness in 2020

First, I would like to greet you all a Happy New Year! It has been a rough 2020 for everyone around the globe going through this unimaginable pandemic. To me, it was more than the pandemic. For those who know me would know what I have gone through and still going through. It is tough, life is not easy, but here I am and my family, we're okay and will be okay as long as we are together. No matter how hard the year has been, I can still say that I am grateful for a million things. Looking at the bright side of things is how we see hope for the future or how we are able to move on. So instead of pondering all the heartaches and dilemmas my family and I went through, I would like to make a list of things that I am grateful for that happened in 2020 (I know I said a million things but let's limit that to ten because that's how much photos I can do in a post on IG):

1. January.. see before the pandemic, my husband and I were able to do a couple of trips. On the first month of the year, we went on an epic trip to India. I would say one of the most memorable I have been and yes, grateful for that opportunity to travel first class as it is a very looong flight. 


2. After our India trip, this friend of mine that introduced me to Jon when we were in college, who now lives in Australia, visited California. My husband arranged our stop on our way home to New Jersey to be LA so that we could meet up with our special friend, our "bridge", Maureen. Last time we saw each other was maybe 22 years ago. Always great to see and catch up with old friends.


3. In February, Jon and I went on a cruise! Valentine's day to be exact. It's also not a "normal" Caribbean cruise but went cruising with the band Train and other stars. We took the ship from Florida and I must say that my husband is truly good at planning our trips so before we got on the boat, we spent a couple of days in Miami and we also visited Everglades (which I am quite sure I posted many years ago that my bucket list is mostly National Parks).


4. Quarantine, lockdown... whatever you call it, there is always the downside and upside and I am only talking of the upside. There is this saying "be careful what you wish for" and dang I got it! My husband is not a homebody. Every long breaks in school, he plans trips, road trips, whatever just to go somewhere. Even on weekends, we rarely stay at home. I appreciate it but sometimes I honestly get tired (and the kids too). Before 2019 ended, he asked the kids and I where we want to go for 2020 and I was like, "I want to say home and do some house improvement or not even improvement but fix things that needs fixing. So the January and February trips we did were supposed to really be "that's it" for 2020 but knowing him, if this pandemic did not happen, we would be out for Spring break, Winter break... what have you. To make the long story short, I had the opportunity to enjoy the house and our yard.


5. My parents live just about 15 miles away and I am lucky to have them close by. Again, there's a bad and good side... wink! In all honesty and not being biased because they are my parents but they are the best. They are always there for me more than I am to them. I cannot say enough how blessed I am to have them. May God always bless and keep them.


6. My kids... oh yes! They could be chaotic, silly, and hardheaded but they bring the joy and love in this household. (Sshh... they cannot read this or they would keep being silly gooseys.) 


7. Aside from being able to enjoy my home during pandemic, this was also a great chance to appreciate and enjoy each other's presence. More cuddling, more conversations, more being present for the family. There are days when my "almost teenager" would rather spend time chatting with her friends but it's ok. This pandemic would probably still be on for a few more months as vaccine is only starting so letting them FaceTime their friends sometimes is allowed.


8. I am grateful for all of God's provisions: food, water, shelter, clothings. We honestly have more than what we need and I am truly thankful that my husband still has a job to sustain our needs (and again, more). This alone, when I am not feeling happy, I just think of the water and food would already lift me up because we all know a lot of people suffering out there especially in third world countries such as the Philippines, where I came from.


9. I thank God for my siblings, relatives, and friends' support. I am very lucky to have a lot of good friends and my family, they are the best. I cannot stress that enough. If I fall, I know there's someone to catch me. Not that I would let myself fall just because I feel secure that way though... but yes, I have good support system here.


10. My husband of course, we don't agree a lot of times and we also love each other more than our disagreements. We are partners and we depend on each other. Without him, the me now would be different, my life would be different, I won't have these beautiful babies... I feel blessed to be in quarantine with my husband. No one I would rather do this life with.


January 13, 2021... this has been on my draft since January 6th. I planned to post a photos alongside my list but it is obviously taking me forever to do that so I am just going ahead and publish this. 

So much has happened the past days... more heartbreaking news. I am not into politics but what has been happening is not simply politics but how humanity has turned to be. Well that would be another story (if I ever feel like talking about this in here). This particular post is supposed to be happy, grateful, positive... 

Happy New Year, Friends! ♡

September 10, 2019

Quiet

A house with three girls... it certainly is never a silence with them. Either they are laughing, having fun, playing or they are fighting, arguing, bugging each other.

With my daily chores: cleaning, laundry, cooking, driving to do more tasks or to bring someone to after-school activities.

If I am lucky, I get to do things I enjoy like gardening, organizing, reading, crafting, writing, shopping (at times).

There really isn't any quiet time but inside me has been quiet. I am not sure how to explain it but physically I am moving around, full of energy but my heart, brain, my emotion... it's been still, quiet, not moving. I feel like I am in the middle of a chaos and bit by bit, slowly, everything is fading. I don't feel like it's a negative or positive feeling inside of me. It's not like I feel depression or anything like that. It just feels it is what it is or maybe I don't have the energy to analyze it too. I don't even feel like talking to anyone, I don't long for anyone. 

But I have this brief moment (while waiting for my baby to nap) to post here and this is giving me an opportunity to somehow express this weird quietness I am going through. Well like I said, it's not depression (I believe). I'm not sad or unhappy about something. Maybe I'm just tired of feeling and thinking? Maybe this is a good thing- to rest your thoughts and emotion? Maybe quiet is good after all.

P.S. Excuse this post. Just writing as I think. I don't care about grammar, spelling, and punctuation right now. Thanks.



May 6, 2019

Surprise!

Surprising myself, that is. As I am very much aware that I have no followers. HA!

Anyhow, my 11 year old kid reminded me that I have not posted anything in years! Life is busy, tough, and beautiful. Promise, I have not been gone for nothing but giving my children full attention. Three girls, five years apart in between... go figure. They each all have totally different needs but one thing in common- they all need ME! If I can pick a special super hero power, it would be being able to multiply myself for each person in the house (yes, that includes the mister too because I cater to him as well.).

I am turning 44 in a week. It's my birthday month and so far so good. Been able to... YES! Post a blog! Second, I have been able to read some books. Third, garden. These are the things I enjoy doing for myself. Simple as that. Makes me happy to have some time for myself sometimes.

I am sitting here in front of my computer while waiting for the littlest one to fall asleep. In a couple of second, she'll be down. Then I have to stop this and go back downstairs to make sure the other two older ones are doing what they are supposed to. One should be done with dinner and the other shower. Ok, gotta go! Wish me luck! Otherwise, there would be screaming and I don't want to wake this baby upstairs.

Nice posting again!

January 29, 2015

Motherhood

Some days are joy and some days are challenging but at the end of the day, no matter what I have been through, no matter how tired I am, no matter how painful, how scary life or the future can be, I feel blessed- at the end of the day. To have these children, to be their mommy, to be granted this job, this opportunity to raise them is such blessing. I thank God for this special gift called "motherhood" everyday. 

November 20, 2014

Self-caring

My girls are both a handful. My 1-1/2 year old is expected to be at her age. However, my older one (6-1/2 years old) became so dependent and changed in a lot of ways ever since her sister was born- sort of trying to get my attention all the time. You won't see it though from her relationship with her baby sister because they are truly the sweetest sisters you'll ever see. The bottom line is I have two kids that are both wants my full attention at this point in my life. 

Most days I'm in my pajamas all day (unless I have errands to do) and when I finally am able to take a shower, it would be sleeping time again. I never really wear make-up or blow dry my hair and all that kind of stuff. I'm a wash and wear type of woman. However, it embarrasses me whenever I bring out my older kid to the door when her bus arrives and the driver would see me wearing my big white robe and when she's dropped off from school I'm still in it. I kind of gotten used to it since I've been doing it since I was pregnant with the second one until last week. 

I made a decision a week ago that I will get out of my pajamas everyday no matter what (even though I have no plans of going somewhere else). I thought it will help me feel energized doing my tasks at home. I thought it will help me feel better, not lousy. I thought it would be helpful and positive to look at least presentable, not having the out-of-the-bed look all the time. I thought it is just the right thing to do. I know, I know... it's a no brainer. For some reason it just became a habit of mine to stay in pjs all day and being busy taking care of my girls became the excuse. Then I realized that taking care of myself a little bit also would be nice for my children because I would feel less stress and I would be yelling less when they become annoying. 

So far it has been working. Plus, I get compliments from my girls like, "I like your sweater, mom." Funny, it's like they have never seen the clothes I wore this past week. Getting out of my pajama is not the only thing I need to do for myself but it is a start. Next would probably be taking time to exercise. Wish me luck!